How a cookbook connects me to my dad

My all time favorite photo of my young dad

My maternal great great-grandfather emigrated from Lebanon when he was 11. I don’t know much about his story but I am fascinated with that part of my cultural heritage. Last spring, one of my favorite podcasts, A Strong Sense of Place, featured books set in Lebanon. Just after listening to host Melissa Joulwan describe Maureen Abood’s cookbook Rose Water and Orange Blossoms, I ordered a copy. In its pages I discovered za’tar, labneh, and pomegranate molasses. This book is more than a cookbook. It is a love letter to the author’s ancestors and immediate family. I was engrossed in Maureen's family stories and began to think of my own. 

In the last years of his life, my father enjoyed telling stories about his childhood. He recalled his aunt’s kibbeh (a meat dish, typically ground lamb, mixed with bulgar wheat and spices). Dad asked for it every time we went to a Lebanese restaurant but few places had it on the menu. When Rose Water and Orange Blossoms arrived in the mail, I immediately flipped to her kibbeh recipes and discovered that this dish can be prepared baked, fried and… raw (called Kibbeh Nayeh). I opted for the baked version and loved it. 

Imagine my shock a few weeks later when my mom shared that she and my dad preferred Kibbeh Nayeh! My parents, who would never try sushi, ate raw meat?! Perhaps I was more surprised that my mom, who does not have a drop of middle eastern blood in her ancestry, enjoyed this dish when she was first married to my dad. By the time I was born, my great aunts and grandmother no longer cooked family meals. They left that to the next generation. So I never had Lebanese food as a child.  

The book arrived in time for Father’s Day last year. As anyone who has lost a father knows, this holiday can be a painful reminder of what is lost. My daughters and I cooked to the tune of the Steve Miller Band (one of Dad’s favorites) and made za’tar roasted tomato and crostini with labneh, phyllo galette of labneh, caramelized cherry tomatoes and kalamata olives and labneh with orange, avocado, pomegranate and honey. Clearly, I am a big fan of labneh (which is a thick yogurt)! Also, I love how the dishes are named after the main ingredients- this makes for easy shopping! 

Our kitchen is small, and countertop space is scarce, but Rose Water and Orange Blossoms occupies a prominent place displayed on a cookbook stand my brother made for me. While not quite a shrine or altar, its presence connects me to my ancestors’ story and most importantly, to my beloved dad.